Feeling Like a Drunk

I don't know what is happening to me since yesterday afternoon. Yesterday morning was really nice! I invited my in- laws for breakfast and we had a good time. After they left; Ammar too, I started feeling really weird. Zaido was super tired after he enjoyed playing with his cousin Amara:) they were SO cute playing together. Zaido fall a sleep for like three Horus mashallah! I tired to study but i really wasn't feeling it... the books were in my hands but my eyes were on the t.v! I wasn't even watching anything...it was a weired feeling...i seriously felt like a drunk! and i should of got some sleep since zaido was sleeping too, but i knew that if I did go to sleep, I would of missed the prayers, so i just sat there pretending to be studying while my eyes were staring at the wall.

I think one of the reasons for this feeling is Ammar's schedule...even thought he has Saturdays and half Sundays off now... he doesn't really have them off sometimes; basically for the next 2 months he is going to be working both Saturdays and Sundays!! which is making me feel like i wana explode sometimes., especially that I'll be done with finals next week.

After Zaido woke up, i felt a little better...we had fun playing and running around the house. Subhannallah, i felt like this boy is such blessing. kids just make you forgot whatever is bothering you, they shine your life when they smile and laugh. Alla ye7meek ya mama.

After Ammar has finished his work, he called me to tell me that he is going to be late because he is going out with a friend! it was like 7:30 pm! I don't know how i did it but i just found my self saying with a happy voice, no problem go have fun with your friends! Zaido and I stayed up playing until we couldn't play anymore; i put him to sleep around 9 and i slept around 10pm.. still Ammar was not home yet! I think he came home around 12!

Today same thing, Ammar left the house at 9:30 am. After i prayed Fajer, i did some studying alhamdulilah...I can't wait to finish my finals...this week feels so looong. And today i had this weird feeling again...i felt like i just wana sleep and not do anything! so i decided that i shouldn't stay at home.. i took Zaido to the park and we had a great time; it was freezing thought. zaido played with some other kids and he is learning to share his beach tools with others:) Zaido also LOVES animals; every time he sees somebody with a dog, he starts laughing and smiling... he comes to me pointing to the dog saying haw haw;) then he makes sure that I'm following him and runs to play with the dogs, as you see in the picture he doesn't just play from far a way, he actually gives the dogs big hugs...and people are usually friendly! of course I gave zaido a shower after that hug..! We should take him to the zoo soon.

After the fun time, the weather started to become colder and colder until i couldn't feel my nose anymore, and i didn't want zaido to get sick la sama7a allah so we left and i bought some Chines food since Ammar is not coming home.

But I'm still thinking of some explanations for my drunky mood, and i found this:

1- Ammar working on weekend for the next month.

2- the babysitter, who made me really mad the other day; i actully saw her in my dream!...even thought when the situation happened i kept my cool; because i figured there is only three more days left and i will not see her again inshallah.

3- Or the Finals....

oh i just remembered reason #4 what if it's the monthly thenge( still waiting)=) well it make sense because It dose make some physiological changes before and after! lool. see I'm telling you... I'm losing it people!

Any way, I've been having some thought about this blogging thenge. i mean it's nice but what if you feel like writing something for yourself...this is the whole idea about blogging too to keep it as a diary...or what if you wana talk about sombody.=) just kiddeing.

may be when i feel like writing to myself, i should leave it as a draft!

...any way i just need to focus on my studying now, so please make some Duaa for me because i need it:(